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Posted by Murat Bilginer on February 23, 2003 09:17:17 UTC

i remember reading about something called the "horn blowing" in scripture. it went something like this:
(paraphrase) and the horn will be blown and man will see much death and terrible suffering from war, injustice plagues and famine. he will see brother killing brother and lust and degeneracy will be everywhere the eye can see. the rivers and seas will die. liars and evil men will be in great numbers. earthquakes will shake the earth and fire will fall from the sky upon the people, until the end of days...

the horn is not the foretelling of whats to come, it is a wake-up call to whats been happening, an alarm clock, this horror has always been, we're just finally waking up to it and accepting it as popular belief...
nows the "test" for us, the same "test" of every generation before, what will we do? will we wait and hope tha everything will be ok? will we side with those that offer security and benefit. will we give "up" ourself in our best manner and stand up against all this evil. this is the question that has been plaguing me for many years now. i never had enough courage to leave the "guaranteed" and popular paths, risking being percieved as lesser or crazy to pursue what it is that must be done and being criticized for it.
i havent worked for the past few months from all this confusion in my heart. i hope to find the courage and a place to start that i can believe in, i never realized how vulnerable i was to this society. i falsely believed that knowing what was wrong with the world around me was enough to protect me and those i cared for from it, it turns out knowing what is wrong with myself is most important as all action starts from within, inaction is lack of conviction. i pray the lord will reveal that truth to me, but not just with my patience or requests anymore, but with my willful actions.
im searching and have found good minds, inclusive of the people here,to share and refine beliefs with, egos are so abundant that those that are willing to hear as well as be heard, understand as well as be understood and be giving as well as be taking. thats where i need to start apparently, with "us", not just me.. cuz "me" sucks.
i would really appreciate any suggestions as to what we can do, or what you would recommend for me (a 30 yr old,ex advertising flunky, construction worker/handyman, full-time helper of anyone that i can) a relevant path where my efforts will matter as opposed to efforts that make me feel like i matter. ive been considering volunteering, or hopoefully working (as i would like to devote all of my time) for the green party, they seem to have the principles, but also they seem a bit hokey or hyper-hippie at times. although they are the closest to a legitimate organization that,so far, is not just surfing on idealism to gain entry to the game and get power. im not a protester, i dont believe that it eliminates the causes, just forces them to augment the effects to secure itself and ironically secure an ever-increasingly authoritarian system by legitimizing fears of radicalism and fanaticism. you dont rid the world of evil by yelling at it, i believe.

all ideas, always welcome.

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