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Posted by Harvey on November 16, 2001 18:40:21 UTC

start treating people with more respect and being more polite.

Instead of saying: "you have no comprehension at all to what I am saying, I'm afraid you just don't have the intellectual abilities to understand (translation: you are an idiot compared to me)".

Why don't you say: "You know, it doesn't seem like we are getting anywhere in this dialogue. Why don't we agree to disagree in this case. I just don't feel that I am getting through to you on this issue. Maybe I'll come across something later that will better communicate my ideas."

Instead of saying: "Well, Mark, where so-in-so is wrong in their view is..." [i.e., between the text I've decided not to respond to that other person but to you].

Why don't you say: "So-in-so, it might be helpful if we work our disagreements through a mediator? Mark appears to be an objective person, if he doesn't mind why don't we mediate through him by addressing our arguments directly through him?"

Instead of saying: "You just don't have the mathematical skills to understand my argument on philosophy."

Why don't you say: "I really would like to focus on the mathematical discussion first, and then we can talk about the philosophical implications. The reason is that I feel that the math cries out in this circumstance that my philosophy is right. Without that approach I feel you won't ever come to understand my approach. Agreed?"

Just a couple of helpful tips.

Warm regards, Harv

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